AI v. The Voice

The Voice vs. American Idol

The Voice’s Top 4-Javier Colon, Dia Frampton, Vicci Martinez, Beverly McClellan

American Idol’s Top 11-Scotty McCreery, Casey Abrams, Haley Reinhart, Jacob Lusk, James Durbin, Karen Rodriguez, Paul McDonald, Lauren Alaina, Stefano Langone, Pia Toscano, Thia Megia

The Voice was one of many shows that tried to compete with American Idol and I actually enjoyed it.  There were some great moments (especially when the contestants performed with their coaches), but overall there is a reason “American Idol” continues to be the most watched show year in and year out (like the epic finale).  One reason is the pool of talent.  American Idol goes out to all these cities and hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of people try out every year.  The Voice seemed to choose from a much smaller pool and it showed. The different concepts of the voice were pretty cool with the coaches and the battle rounds, but it lacked the talent to really be amazing.  From day one, we knew who was going to win The Voice, and that is never the case with American Idol.

In my opinion, only one person in the top four of The Voice (Javier Colon) would have made it into the top 11 on American Idol. Some people may argue that Dia and Vicci would have made it to the top 11, my counter would be that Thia and Pia were the 11^th and 10^th contestants voted off of “American Idol.”  They are all attractive female artists with interesting voices, but Thia and Pia had more powerful voices, they were more attractive, and they both had more star potential.  (Pia already has a record deal and she was 10^th this season on American Idol)

That leads us to another problem with The Voice-the coaches seemed to feel sorry for the contestants instead of treat them like artists.  This was evidenced by Adam Levine’s comments that this show was not about potential but about giving Javier Colon (failed artists) a last shot at making it big.  While I believe Javier was the right decision, I also believe he had way more potential.  That’s what we want out of these shows, potential stars.  I think Adams ideals shone bright in Christina Aguilera’s final two team members who were older bald women that have already tried and failed in the music industry.  Only Blake Shelton seemed to get the idea of trying to form a voice out of a young talent with potential.  Did it work?  I guess not because “Team Adam” won.  Also, I didn’t get the whole team thing and why it mattered that Adam won, what did he get? (Besides bragging rights against Christina which he already has because he is obviously way cooler)

The best punch The Voice threw (besides the coach/contestant collaborations) is that Javier Colon was better than any contestant on American Idol since Carrie Underwood.  That bald dude with the hat can really make your knees weak (yeah maybe even mine).  He has the voice of an angel and I would bet any amount of money that he becomes more successful than Scotty McCreery (whom I love and hope he succeeds because he seems like a really good, humble kid with a nice deep country voice).  I believe they will both be pretty successful, but Javier has something special and The Voice discovered him.

The best two things about The Voice that I would draft 1 and 2 in a singing contest show draft would be a winner like Javier Colon and a judge/coach like Adam Levine (cool, suave, knows what he is talking about, comes out with new hits during the show, can still perform, rips on people, is funny, and wins).  Number 3-100 would be “American Idol” people, probably starting with Jlo because she’s gorgeous plus most of the things I praised Adam for and the show couldn’t run without Seacrest so he would probably be next.

All in all I thought The Voice was alright, but “American Idol’s” spot at the top is safe for now, I can’t wait to see what Simon Cowell’s X-Factor has in store.

P.S. I still wish Paul McDonald would have won!

Girls have their sports

Reality TV as Sport for the Women in our Lives

            Yes, most men like to watch, play, and talk about sports more than most other subjects.  There is something manly about knowing more about a particular sport than another man.  We don’t need to know more about EVERY sport, just our sport and whatever tragic/heroic story the media is vomiting all over ESPN and other news channels.  It is very important to us, and our significant others hate it for that reason and that reason only.  Men hear it for watching sports their entire lives…“I don’t get it,” “It’s so (insert derogatory adjective here),” “Why do you say you are watching THE game every night like there is only one?” “All you do is watch sports,” “How long are these games?”

            Guess what ladies; it’s time for a little self-examination. Let’s compare our sports watching with your reality TV obsession.  There are many similarities.  We both watch real people on TV supposedly without a script.  We both love some players/characters and hate others.  We follow those characters in the news and twitter to see what they are up to.  We follow some so much we feel like we know them.  Women call each other on the phone to talk about the trashiness of one girl and the sweetness of another.  Women love to hate the contestants on “America’s Next Top Model” just as much as they love to cry happy tears for the peoples’ lives that are changed on “Biggest Loser” and “Extreme Makeover.”  They check out all the dudes on “The Bachelorette” and pick who they like the best while critiquing the way the bachelorette chooses her men and how she dresses while choosing. “The Bachelor” is a whole other story.  The bachelor starts out as this heroic heart throb and usually turns into a crazy jerk when news stories start to come out while the show airs.  And checking out the female characters fighting for him takes girl-talk to its peak.  Some girls are so incredibly lovable that you want to cry when she is ultimately sent home for the hottest girl on the show who inevitably wins everytime despite the fact that she “Isn’t there for the right reasons (love).”  While other girls strike such a nerve all you can say is, “No wonder she is single.” 

            The next similarity between sports and reality TV is that they both run for seasons.  They are usually on one night a week (and don’t say sports are so much longer when “American Idol” and “The Bachelor” series (Bachelor/Bachelorette/Bachelorpad) run multiple shows some weeks with airtime over two hours for a certain number of weeks until emphatically coming to an end beginning a short hiatus until the next season begins.

            Lastly, the unfortunate similarity of the lockout two of men’s most watched sports (NBA and NFL) are faced with is not a feeling unknown to women around the country.  Writer’s strike aside, women know what it feels like to lose their favorite viewing hobby.  While it was entertaining and fun to watch the stars of “Jon & Kate Plus 8” publicly make terrible decisions and become drastically better looking (at least one of them did), that reality show stopped and now you are left with a boring show only involving Kate.  Even worse, when “Laguna Beach” ended at least you had “The Hills” and shortly after it was joined by “The City.”  Now they are all off the air and all you have is some less than entertaining books by L.C. and sporadic reality TV cameo’s by Speidi.  It’s just not the same when they leave, but there is always a new reality TV idea on the horizon so be patient and always remember, “If you build it, they will come.”

            So ladies I hope next time you want to complain to your man about watching/yelling/crying about sports you will stop and think about last night’s episode of whatever you watched and go call one of your friends.  

Sneak Peak-Golf

Golf- The One True, Everlasting Love/Hate Relationship

Most people have a different outlook/definition/classification for golf.  Some people think it is boring, others think it is hard, others think it is fun, some people hate it, some love it, some say it is too hard, some think it’s easy (I do not know many of these people… probably because I don’t associate with liars), some use it to relax, and some think it’s frustrating and stressful.  Golf is unlike any other sport in this way.  Most men would not say basketball and football are boring, they may love or hate these sports, but these sports would rarely stress them out and playing these sports rarely leads to you never wanting to play them ever again (excluding injury).  But that’s golf folks, at least for us mid to high handicappers (I am being generous to my game with this classification-somewhere between 13-30 is a mid to high handicapper by my definition).  

Golf can be really fun to play and watch, but even as a golf fan, nothing is better to fall asleep to on a Saturday afternoon than a golf tournament.  And no game drags on longer when you are playing terribly than golf.  Boring is a fair description of golf in my opinion.  I personally do not think it is boring; I actually love watching and playing golf.  However, for those who do not play or follow golf, I think it would be the most boring sport in America.  And that is what people hate about golf, it can be really boring and if you are one of those people, you may want to stop reading to avoid more boredom.

One the other hand, those of us who are lucky and jobless enough to play golf  at least once a week find it fun.  While my mother and wife highly disagree with me I think golf is somewhat a workout (especially for my dad who kayaks once a month for exercise).  Golf is a sport that anyone can play, and play well.  Ten-year-old kids can beat me as can 65-year-old men or women and vise versa.  You can never really tell how well someone is going to play when you look at him or her. It is a game I can play for the rest of my life and that is something I cannot say about football or basketball.  Sooner or later I just won’t be able to hang with the younger guys in those sports as my dad currently cannot hang with me in any sport.  But golf, there is a sport I can only get better at the more I play, and that is why many people (including myself) love golf-it is a lifelong sport.

Another handful of fair descriptions of golf is that it is frustrating, stressful, hard, and time-consuming.  The more you play, the better you get, and the better you want/expect to do.  The only problem with that is, when you play a lot and suck, it’s worse than when you rarely play and suck.  Expectations are one of the worst things to have in golf.  Golf is a hard game.  It is hard to be mediocre and nearly impossible to be “good” by everyone’s standards.  It takes so much time, patience, and money to excel at golf. When you watch the pros do it on TV it makes you doubt whether you should even try playing because you will NEVER be that good.  If you are competitive (as I am, to a deficit) you want to be as good as you can be, you want to beat people.  I want to beat every person I play with, and that rarely happens.  I will just lose it on wholes 5, 6, and 7.  And in my head, once I lose it for those three holes its like the day is over.  I can never look ahead or salvage a good day.  I start thinking about breaking/throwing clubs, walking off the course, quitting, and all sorts of other immature acts of poor sportsmanship.  It’s either a great day or a horrible day for me and many other mediocre golfers.  That puts a lost of stress on a guy that does this for “fun” and this is supposed to be my escape from reading and writing hundreds of pages of boring law topics you would never care to read about.  It is so frustrating when you have been practicing and you hit them well on the range, and then you get excited to hit the course.  But when you get out there you cannot seem to get the ball to go straight all day.  It makes me want to quit forever, but about a day later I get the itch again and the cycle starts over.  The frustration, stress, difficulty, and time are why so many people (including myself) hate golf.

The weird thing is, that difficulty, stress, and time are also what we love about golf-when we play well.  When you hit that perfect shot (for me about once a round) you are just in love with this game.  There is nothing better.  It’s an individual sport, it’s all on you, and you just came through (even if it’s just for one shot).  I saw a hat in a golf store that said, “I hate golf!” “I hate golf!” “I want to quit!” “Great Shot!!” “I love golf!” and that could not be more perfectly written.  When it’s bad it’s bad, but man when it’s good it’s great.  Those great shots are what keep you coming back.  And if you are lucky enough to string a few good holes or even a great day together and you shoot a low score, you may just be hooked forever.  If you have ever hit the ball well on the golf course you know this feeling of love I speak of.

One of the worst things about golf that many people (again, including myself) hate is how expensive it is.  A decent set of clubs (which in real golf land just means irons) is about $1,000 (you can get away with a nice set of last year’s model like I did for about $350).  Then if you want a good driver it will set you back at least $150 for last years model. But if you want the newest, best thing it will cost you $400 (The New TaylorMade R11-its beautiful).  Then you need fairway woods that are anywhere from $125-$200 a piece (most people carry two in their bag).  Then you have a wedge set (maybe 2) and they can be anywhere from $100-$125. You obviously need a putter which is $70-$200. And once you buy all these clubs, you need a place to put them and bags run around $100.  Then you need a glove-$20, tees-$5 every couple months, and balls-these have a serious price range anywhere from $10-$75 for a pack of 12.  Now that you have your tools, you need to go play! You can play golf for just about any amount of money depending on where and when you play, but let’s put it this way-it isn’t cheap!  So all this money that goes into a hobby is a bit absurd and this is why so many wives (and dudes that play, including myself) HATE golf.

Probably the best thing (for decent golfers that play for fun) about golf is the time you spend out there with your friends and family.  Yeah the sport is fun, but a round of golf can be a great time for other reasons.  You have plenty of time to talk, joke around, drink some beer, smoke some cigars, get to know new friends, and talk shop with others.  When you mix in a few good shots to keep your spirits up with a few swings and misses and shots off of trees two feet in front of you-you can guarantee a lot of laughs and a really fun time.  This is one of the main reasons my bachelor party weekend (which included a round of golf for over 20 guys in our group) so memorable and so much fun.  These times with friends and family are why I and so many other people in America LOVE golf.

Love it or Hate it Golf is a unique sport that many of us will play for the rest of our lives, with our Grandfather, fathers, friends, siblings, wives, sons, and grandsons.  It is a game that can cross generations and bring us together with those closest to us.  Golf is a great game (even though sometimes it sucks) so if you have never tried it, I think you should. 

Sneak Peak

Rivals Diary 7-13-11

It was my dad’s birthday dinner tonight so Me, Whitney (My Wife), Louise (My Sister), Tim (My Brother-In-Law), Gina (My other sister), Zack (Her B/F) and my parents are all sitting in Louise’s TV room and I am trying to focus on my favorite sporting event of the week. This is going to be difficult to say the least.

9:50 pm-Got my pre-show text from Dean and he is excited about the Male jungle tonight but only one feeling is going through my body-Fear.  I am afraid one of my challenge favorites (Evan or CT) might be going home tonight and that would be almost as bad as FSU not scoring a single touchdown against OU in the 2000 ship.

10:00 pm-GAMETIME!!!

10:02 pm-“Jasmine looks like a 6 year old”-yes and she acts like one too

10:04 pm-Katelyn or Mike Mike-would you rather/who would win in a fight? I LOVEEE this alliance of Team Evan, Beauty and the Beast, Bananas and Banana Hammock. D-DAY TOMORROW!!

10:05 pm- Ev better watch it… Matty P look a like may be a bit chubby but he is not “fat and out of shape” … or is he? And Paula would literally make out with anyone… don’t act like you didn’t wanna kiss Ty.

10:06 pm-mad respect for CT from Leroy… “He’s got them girls hypnotized.” Hammock Crawl looks boring but Tylers new nickname (banana hammock) may come into play here

10:17 pm CT and adam are the team to beat again… go figure

10:18 pm- Katelynn has a deathly fear of water? What a vag… isn’t that ironic?  Why are you on a challenge show if you have a fear of heights AND water? And who has a fear of water, honestly… And Mandi is pretty hot, even though she sucks.

10:20 pm – beauty and the beast are off…  and Kenny is seriously struggling… what is going on Mr. Beautiful???

10:24 pm – Kenny blows it… weakest link? Doubt it Wes… not as long as you’re ugly.  Ty and Brandon make it… who cares… more importantly CT wants Adam to say he is his friend so bad he might “beat it out of him” mannn I love me some CT.

10:24 pm- Laurel is dominating again… This is a good sign, and Cara Maria is getting more confident because she is starting to think Laurel likes her, which is not the case. And now the other two teams in the alliance that are not Kenny and Wes are going and they have to win so that CT doesn’t. Banana Hammock thinks Johnny is comforting… this is turning into brokeback challenge but I think I like it. Meanwhile Nehemiah and Evan are sure they won… we will see about that.

10:28 pm – Paula and Ev go… nobody cares… they lose, which means LAUREL WINS YAAAA budday, but they don’t win money, stupid.

10:30 pm – NEHEMIAH AND EVAN WIN, o wait they actually DQed… but its okay because Johnny and Tyler win... haha evan “congrats little boys, you won on accident” and this is NOT looking good for Kenny he has really been sucking it up… He needs to pick it up, and he is ADMITTING he is losing his edge and mojo… AHHHH NOOOO this sucks I hate seeing Mr. Beautiful so down in the dumps and on “suicide watch” I might have to stop watching, but I cant… even though it wouldn’t be as amazing, this show would go on without Kenny.

10:36 pm-D-day is out… Wes and Kenny is scared… and they are manipulating Mike Mike-just compliment him... he’s just like a woman you tell him what he wants to hear and he will be eating out of the palm of your hand… LOL I’m kidding… really

10:38 pm – Jasmine and Jonna continue to suck yet they are still on the show, I don’t get it.  Beauty and the Beast against the brothas… this could be interesting because Ty and Brandon are pretty good I think… I would rather take Leroy and Mike.

10:40 pm- PARTY TIME... best part of the show. Ahhahaa Evan “mike and paula are like that weird couple that met on the internet, you’re not sure what their bio said, but it works.” And Laurel wants CT, its obvious… hahaha CT-“She wants me because I’m like the bad boy and she can’t have me” CT is so amazing, I LOVE YOU CT… he is gonna SLAY. Laurel thinks he is so sexy and Mandi is “worried” ummm have you seen him? You should be worried if you think you can lock him down… man CT is LTD (livin the dream)

10:45 pm- Mark this down on your calendar, Paula finally said something smart and it is worth a quote… “CT is doing work with the ladies” haha and back to back another random person with a good quote-Brandon, “We gonna shock the world and take down the power that is Kenny and Wes, then come home and have sex with every girl in the house” hahaha and Wes-“I can’t stop beating people, at real life and in these challenges.” And Kenny is on the brink of a mental breakdown, I am SERIOUSLY nervous. Luckily he has some good friends on the show to hold his hand… thank you Evan, Johnny, and Adam. KENNY GET YOUR ISH TOGETHER I NEED THIS!!!!

10:50  pm- Its jungle time… Male jungle at that so its serious! Wes and Kenny are in it again and I don’t like this.  It’s a physical challenge, rope climbing challenge… here we go. Wes is cocky and I like it… Kenny, not so much, and I hate it. Of course the cocky dude rocks it and the scared dude sucks… KENNY COME ON… ugh ok whatever lets go Wes you got this…

10:53 pm – commercial… I just feel like Wes is gonna win… he has the body of a Greek Sculpture as he says and that usually means you can do some crossfit rope climbs… L-train would win this event easy… but he’s not here, ok this commercial break feels like Dustin Hopkins lining up for a game winning field goal… heart is pounding… D-hop hits some and misses others so that analogy was not at all confident but I always have hope!

10:56 pm- we are back… its all on you uglyman… yessss wes is winning, Brandon gives up!!! Ahhhh yesssssssss yess yess Kenny stays... he seriously needs to get his act together though… One good thing that is coming from this… Kenny is beginning to respect Wes a little. Hahah Wes-“I’m a physical specimen carved by Zeus and when people ask me what I’m good at I say EVERYTHING, that’s what I’m good at.”

10:58 pm- Ty kinda sucks I think… whatever though all is good in challenge land and I can sleep easy tonight… take care folks and I’ll see you next week. Wes is a little bozo talking crap behind Kenny’s back... if I could slap through the TV Wes’s face would be nice and red… PS next week it looks like Jasmine flips out, good I hope she goes home…

ANother Sneak Peak-Problems with the All-Star Games

All-Star problem

There are obvious flaws with the All-Star games in the NFL, NBA, and MLB.  The players don’t care to play in them (16 players who were selected to this years MLB All-Star game will not attend for one reason or another).  They don’t matter.  They artificially enhance stats for stars when talking about the Hall Of Fame (“He made 16 All-Star games” “He only made 12”) and the games these players skip still count toward those stats.  They change the rules and make the game even more boring (no blitzes during the NFL All-Star Game).  Defense virtually disappears.  Yes, the games still sell out, but it has been years since I have heard anyone talk about watching or going to an All-Star game.  Here’s the good, the bad, and the ugly surrounding the All-Star game problem and what I would do to fix it. 

Events surrounding the All-Star Game

MLB-Home Run Derby-I think the HR Derby is a definite plus and people still enjoy it. I personally think it is a little bit boring, but hey, it is baseball we are talking about. 

            The Future’s game-Boring, I have no clue who any of these kids are.

NBA-Dunk Contest-This used to be one of the best events of the year, however, in recent years the stars have not elected to participate and it has dropped a few notches.  Blake Griffin shows some promise but jumping over/around the hood of a Kia was unimpressive.  The NBA/Fans/Owners simply need to give the players some incentive to compete in this competition.  The days are long gone when players were rivals of other players and would take any chance they got to show their rival up (Jordan v. Everyone, Bird v. Magic, all this is gone mainly because of the Heat and secondarily because of the Celtics and all this talk about joining forces).  It just isn’t nearly as fun as it used to be.  Yes, the players make plenty of money and they should want to give it their all and perform for the fans, but the fact of the matter is they don’t care.  However, I’d be willing to bet they would care more if money, fame, or success was on the line.  We should bring back the talks of-Jordan is the best player ever because of his 6 championships, 6 Finals MVP’s, 5 regular season MVP’s, and, oh yeah, because he won 2 NBA Slam Dunk Titles (seriously those are 2 more reasons he is better than Lebron… Jus Sayin).

            3-pt shootout-it is what it is, some people like it and others don’t.  I don’t think it hurts the All-Star weekend and I personally enjoy watching it, but I am not crushed if I miss it.

            Rookie/Sophomore Challenge- I personally love it, even though there is no defense.  It gives us a chance to see the best young players in the league compete before they become    too cool for the All-Star weekend.  And unlike the MLB Future’s game, we actually know who these guys are and have seen what they can do against the best talent in the world.

NFL-absolutely nothing-this is a big problem-I personally think they need to bring back some skilled challenges. Every position should have a skills challenge and the players voted into the game should participate for prizes or money for charities etc.  I loved watching the 40 yd. dash to see who the fastest player in shorts was.  There could be bench press competitions, cone drills, shuttles, high jump, broad jump, passing challenges, etc. The NFL All-Star weekend is the worst in my opinion.

The Game itself

MLB-there is a pseudo prize, but I still think it’s boring.  More players skip this than any other All-Star game.  It is not close enough to a real game for it to play like a real game because of all the pitching changes and substitutions.  Unlike Basketball and Football, substitutions are not a norm in Baseball so these games seem fake/staged.  I think the MLB All-Star game is somewhere in the middle but could use some fresh new ideas and incentives to get the best players that the fans want to see on the field.

NBA-In my opinion, this is the best All-Star game/weekend left.  The best players usually play, and they put on a show. It’s fun, and the Dunk Contest is still exciting to watch in case something cool happens (Like Superman Flying to victory or Nate “Spudd Webb” Robinson putting on the Kryptonite suite and “stealing” one from the man of steal.) Most of the players, including the big-time stars, still get excited about the All-Star weekend and go crazy when they see a big dunk or an illusive pass.  And when the players get excited, the fans get excited.  The NBA game needs the least change in my opinion. 

NFL-The best sport has the worst All-Star game/weekend.  I have some propositions that could seriously increase its watchability.  First (as I said before) bring in some skills’ challenges.  Second-forget the game, just cut it out completely.  Don’t freak out, just listen.  No one wants to see anyone get hurt in a fake game that doesn’t matter like this.  No fan wants to see it, no coach wants to see it, and no player wants to be a part of it.  Therefore, big hits are eliminated, blitzing is gone, defense is gone, and what we love about NFL football is basically gone (besides Tom Brady’s hair and Peyton Manning’s Laser-Rocket arm).  So what would we do instead (in addition to the skills challenges)? A flag football tounrnament.  Make it an all-day thing or and all-weekend thing.  Basically each year three “strings” of players are voted onto each all star team (for this tournament that would be changed to four “strings” per conference which would set up four teams on each side of the bracket).  So a bracket would be set up with all the AFC teams on one side and the NFC teams on the other to battle it out for the top team in their conference.  Then top team from each conference would play each other for the championship.  The teams could be picked for the players or we could televise a live draft with the QB’s as captains.  This year might have looked something like this

AFC SQUADS

Phillip Rivers                 Peyton Manning            Tom Brady

Arian Foster                 Chris Johnson               Jamaal Charles

Reggie Wayne              Dwayne Bowe              Wes Welker

Brandon Lloyd              Ed Reed                       Zach Miller

Troy Polamalu              Asante Samuel             Andre Johnson

Mercedes Lewis           Antonio Gates              Mike Wallace

Darrelle Revis               Champ Bailey               Devin McCourty

Michael Griffin              Eric Berry                     Brandon Merriweather

Shane Lechler               Sebastian Janikowski    Billy Cundiff

NFC SQUADS

Michael Vick                Aaron Rodgers              Drew Brees     

Michael Turner             Steven Jackson               Adrian Peterson

Roddy White                Calvin Johnson             Larry Fitzgerald

Jason Witten                 Tony Gonzalez              Miles Austin

Devin Hester                Desean Jackson            Nnamdi Asomugha

Charles Woodson         Marcus Colston            Greg Jennings

DeAngelo Hall              Brent Grimes                Antoine Winfield

Antrel Rolle                  Adrian Wilson              Roman Harper

Mat McBriar                David Akers                 David Buehler

Risk of injury would be way down, defenders could actually play defense, kick offs and field goals included, and blitzing would be allowed. Many variations of this idea could work and I think it would turn into a really fun, new, cool, and marketable weekend.

I guess that’s enough All-Star talk, if you have any suggestions feel free to post a comment. 

P.S. I realize it’s the Pro Bowl in the NFL, but for sake of flow just go with me on calling it the All-Star game… Thanks.

Another Sneak Peak-The Twilight Zone of Sport

The Twilight Zone of Sport

We are in the Twilight Zone (an indefinite or transitional condition or area) of sports and I don’t like it nor do I understand it completely. This is evidenced by the fact that currently my favorite sport is MTV’s Real World/Road Rules challenge-The Challenge: Rivals.  This show is my saving grace, instead of anxiously awaiting Saturdays and Sundays with E.J. Manuel and Ochocinco, I look forward to Wednesday nights with Mr. Beautiful and his ugly-faced partner, Wes.  This time of year always makes me question everything around me.  I question the industry that is Sport and how it could miss so terribly on a season (summer) when so many people have so little to do.  I question ESPN and their attempts at brainwashing me into enjoying NASCAR, pool, tennis, fishing, or women’s sports.  Women’s sports are not my favorite thing to watch, but I will admit I found myself on pins and needles as I watched the Women’s World Cup and team USA sprint, shoot, and score their way to victory.  The team looked good doing it which lead to many of my Facebook friends posting status proposals to Hope Solo and many other members of our nation’s team.  Now that is what I love about women’s sports, women.  ESPN obviously feels the same way as they flood my two favorite channels with women sports.  The only problem is, I like sports with dudes and balls more than anything in the world. However, right now the only sport including dudes with balls I have is baseball.  Everyone knows baseball is boring, even people who love it, they know.  They only watch because they grew up with a father who loved baseball.  Casual baseball fans get bored by inning 2.  Don’t get me wrong, baseball is a real sport, it is not cheerleading or poker.  The only problem is, it is a real boring sport.  You know what else is boring to watch? Golf, and I love golf. I play golf, I watch golf, I follow golf, but it is painfully boring for most people to watch.  Majority rules in this country, so just because I like golf does not make it exciting.  Guess when the golf season is in full swing (pun intended)?  Yep, the Twilight Zone of summer.  So here is a short recap of the sports we have to choose from during our three months off from school, teaching, work, etc.-Baseball, Golf, Tennis, NASCAR, Fishing, Pool, and, every four years some legitimate soccer.  Donald Trump needs to do his best L. Ron Hubbard impression and create a sport or bring high-quality competitive football back to rule the summer.  After all, it is his fault the UFL failed, he needs to pay football fans back and make something happen.

To make matters worse, the future is bleaker than Paulie Bleeker’s baby’s future in Juno.  115 days have passed and the NFL is still in the middle of a lockout and the NBA seems to be following suit.  No true football fan is surprised because we all saw this coming, but that doesn’t make it any easier. There will be a more technical piece on the lockouts coming later, but for now I’ll just touch on the subject.  I hear writers, journalists, reporters, newscasters, and lay people alike complaining about these greedy “millionaire players vs. billionaire owners” fighting over a few billion dollars, “like they need it.”  I personally could care less, go ahead and fight it out.  Just finish all this nonsense by Week 1 or else… or else what you may ask? Or else… nothing, I might shed a tear and have more time to read and brief cases, but that’s about it.  Nothing will change, I may want to boycott football (it is already sickening that these players and coach’s will make more money in 5 years then I will make in my life after 4 years of college and 3 years of law school) but I know it would be physically impossible for me not to constantly watch and talk about sports.  Sport (all sports-playing and watching) is my first love and nothing will ever change that.  They may make my wife more jealous than any smoking hot girl from my past and she can try to erase it from my thoughts, dreams, and desires, but her efforts will fail as miserably as any male contestants on The Challenge under 6’2-225lbs. not named Derrick Kosinski.  I simply cannot help the fact that my song to Sport is Michael Jackson’s “I Can’t Stop Loving You.”

Whenever real sports like football begin, I will be there watching every pre-game, live game, and post game show I can.  I will be playing more Madden ’12 than should be legal for a law student.  I will join every fantasy football league I can create or am invited to.  They say you never know what you had until its gone, that is not the case here, I have known what I have in football since my first sports memory (me crying like a girl while Charlie Ward (the best collegiate two sport athlete of all time-is it a coincidence that the best professional two sport athlete of all time also laced up for FSU? Primtime!!) was humanized in South Bend as ND seemed to have stolen our season-or not-1993 Champs!).  Sports invoked emotions I didn’t know I had as a boy and they continue to do so today. 

So how is it that the sport industry continues to epically fail during this seemingly opportunistic period in the summer?

Why do they allow fans a chance to question everything about the industry? 

Will this Twilight Zone ever cause us to forget about sports in an “out of sight out of mind” sort of way?

Or will this Twilight Zone of sport that creates so much build up, anxiety, and anticipation continue to be the  precise reason we love it so much when sports kick it back into full gear?

Rivals Diary

Rivals Diary-July 6, 2011-My innermost thoughts during the greatest show on TV.

I am at my sister’s house without DVR so I will do my best with quotes and accuracies, but I apologize in advance for my imperfections.

9:50 ET- The previews for this week’s episode look juicy as always and I got my weekly pre-show text from my boy Dean saying “Best day of the week!!! Wes v. CT tonight son!” to get me all pumped and ready to get this show on the road.

10:00 ET-It’s game time baby!! Teen Mom is finally over and it’s time for CT’s tactics.

10:01 ET- Something still looks off about T.J. but man do I love him

10:03 ET- Not a good look Mike, especially if Paula is diggin it… And Cara Maria thinks her and Laurel have a complicated relationship… umm no you don’t, Laurel just hates you, its “The Rivals” helloooo?

10:05 ET- Camilla needs a translator… How do you say...Intimacy. Nope, not the word you were looking for, try again…

10:06- First memorable CT quote of the night, OMG hold that thought, make it the first line of memorable CT quotes: “No, not even a little bit, because I will SMOKE you!” “I’ll rip your head off as soon as I get the chance, I don’t care if I lose I’m taking your head with me, I’ll eat your face off!” “You know I’m better than you” “Ya! Lay down, Lay down M*F*” Wes-“He said he was gonna eat me L, He’s a bully” Wes is barking up the wrong tree… As Julia Roberts would say… Big mistake… HUGE. CT is going to “Bend” Wes in half the first chance he gets… man was Dean right in that Pre-show text… FIRST CT BEAST MODE OF THE SEASON AND I LOVE IT!! Mr. Beautiful needs to get his chick in line.

10:13 ET-Sink or Swim time, all the guys are safe so I won’t be crying tonight… Hopefully Jasmine goes home tonight so we don’t have to hear how people do it in Houston anymore. Coordination will come into play for this challenge as the contestants have to jump onto the zip line at the same time… first two sets of girls struggle mightily, but they take the fall and keep swimming… that doesn’t look like the case for Mike.

10:17 ET-Laurel, my favorite girl, DQs for trying to be smart and CT laughs and says “those kids taking some dingaz”

10:18 ET-Leroy lands on Mike… Sorry for my previous comments, that looked like it hurt, but I would not make Youtube Grape Lady noises on national TV no matter what happened to me.  Of course, commercial.

10:22 ET- I’ve been booted from the TV room because my sister and brother in law would rather watch some show on Netflix than the best show of all time.

10:24 ET- Thank you Johnny Bananas for your expert medical opinion about Mike’s condition ending with “At this point anything is possible.”

10:25 ET- The guys’ teams fight and bicker about being scared of the fall, but nobody cares, all we care about is this matchup of epic proportions CT v. Beauty and the Beast!

10:26 ET-Big surprise-CT wins… and they have the best time, but I think Beauty and the Beast got second. And I am beginning to think Evan has lost his championship winning/shady alliance making/back stabbing/Matty P lookalike swagger because he is such a non-factor as it seems in the early going.

10:28 ET-And the girl winners are… Commercial, but nobody cares because Laurel is in the jungle and we already saw CT show why only beating up smaller contestants can get him booted off of a show. He is gonna get some serious Fantasy points in Bill Simmons’ league this week.

10:31 ET-I was playing Hanging with friends with my sister who is in the other room so I missed the Girls winner but I could care less… MIKE IS OKAY! Few… O no he is flirting with Paula… rookie mistake. 

10:34 ET-The alliances form and Paula still miserably tries to set up an easy win for her which would make me think history is going to repeat itself. Votes happen, my fears of Evan’s lack of pull came true as he could not sway the vote and Jasmine lives to play another day… bad decision. Paula is also on my chopping block.

10:36 ET-T.J. is gonna be pissed if these girls quit, but I could care less because that would mean Laurel sticks around to knock off team Jasmine and team Paula… I think Theresa is drunk.

10:40 ET-Mandy is throwing herself at CT and I love it… CT’s reaction “She is out of her mind if she thinks she is going to get a chokehold out of me, it sounds like jail time to me.”  (Do you think he means rape jail or just regular jail?) Wes is so jealous his skin is turning green.  He always loses when it comes to girls, usually to Kenny, but this week it is to CT, in more ways than one.  Mandy is pretty hot so I would be Okay if CT had a threesome with her and some other girl in the house, she isn’t hot enough to get all his attention.

10:41 ET-“All I do is just sit here and win” “Ya, I’m fliring with all the girls, throwing out a little bait, and Mandy took the flirty bait hard and now she’s relentless”-All quotes from here on out will be coming from CT.

10:42 ET-Johnny Bananas is with me… He hopes T.J. rips them a new one… NEWSFLASH-Throwing the Jungle was just a plan by the cute chick Theresa and the non-English speaking Camilla… it was just last year Theresa was rejecting Wes for a chance with Mr. Beautiful only to get shut down by him and run back to Wes… Ah how a year can change things.  P.S. Theresa said she is P.M.S.ing… false alarm on the drunk comment earlier.

10:47 ET-Laurel is ignoring Cara Maria… probably because she sucks and Laurel is getting bored carrying her “little sister” around this challenge.  I Hope she can carry her to victory in the jungle today… I really hope she doesn’t fall for this fake challenge throw Theresa is selling her.

10:48 ET-This show is as rigged as the NBA, it’s a puzzle, with Laurel, because she would literally beat every girl and 75% of the guys at any physical challenge. She better win.

10:50 ET- Its part puzzle part physical, Lauren should be able to handle this if Cara Maria doesn’t completely suck… Bad news, Cara Maria is sucking… it doesn’t look good for team Laurel, if MTV rigs this for Paula to win I may stop watching… but not really.

10:52 ET-During the commercial break I realize this episode is not that great yet I still have over two pages of diary entries… can you tell I’m obsessed?

10:55 ET-Okay Cara Maria says she is not ready to go home (um?)… One side is significantly better but I can’t tell whose it is… TEAM LAUREL WINS!!! Peace out fake quitters… I won’t miss Camilla’s mispronunciations…LOLOL @ Theresa who just said “Ya, Camilla’s mouth gets in the way sometimes” I couldn’t agree more.

10:58 ET-All the guys are still trying to get rid of CT and everyone is scared… EVERYONE EXCEPT EVAN. While I like his cahones, old Evan (Championship Evan) would have never agreed to go in this early and especially not against the best team… He is definitely slipping, but I like his irrational confidence.

11:00 ET-Shows over folks, but next week looks promising with more focus on CT flirting with chicks and fighting for his challenge life. Until then…